It’s hard to write when my muscles are burning and my brain is churning.
So much to do and so little time – no spare seconds to jot down rhymes.
No, seriously, the above is about the best I can come up with. Not surprisingly, chronic pain and fatigue take their toll – as does the PTSD and all the B.S. that comes with it. Don’t get me wrong, I think sometimes the crazy helps the creative writing… but today is not one of those days.
Today has been an exercise in frustration. After a fitful sleep, disturbed by aches and pains; I got out of bed and tried to tackle some chores that are far overdue, however I was met with physical distractions at every turn.
My head swimming with vertigo, a midsection that feels like it’s full of glass and broken bits of porcupine. I can’t raise my arms above my head today, nor turn my neck to the left, which makes things like driving (which I had to do) or putting away dishes an exercise in personal torture. Even typing this is tiring… my hands hurt and my arms are heavy and feel weak. Seriously folks, Chronic Fatigue flares are the devil’s balls; a dank, dark, nasty level of exhaustion that could only have been created by team evil.
Why does all this matter? Why this is today’s writing exercise? Because I simply can’t think of anything else… so, free-write time it is. *looks at timer which still has 9 minutes on it*
I’ve been making a bigger commitment to my own writing (as opposed to the writing I do for others – under their name/blog/newsletter/general-copy) as of late – which has been paying off. I’m actually doing a pretty decent job of keeping on a daily schedule of writing and I’ve just finished the manuscript for my first book – mostly as a test run on self-publication while I finish up two other, larger, projects I have in the works. However, test run or not I’m both terrified and excited – ‘terricited’ if you will. I mean… I wrote a book… that’s kind of cool, right? Okay, yes, it’s a book of poetry, not the great American novel… but it’s chock-full of pieces of my soul. (Oh look, I managed another rhyme).
I started the last round of Writing 101 and managed to follow for 9 assignments or so before I got distracted by shiny things – likely because some of the prompts were requesting that I delve into pieces of myself that I am not yet ready to dig at… that said, I’ve decided to go back and finish as many of the prompts as I’m able, in whatever order my gray-matter decides is acceptable. I’ll just work it around some other writing prompts I’ve been using – such as looking at Google images or poking at my own crazy to see what leaks out.
I’m enjoying the hell out of creating my own stuff and just shoving it out into the world to see what works. It’s one thing to write out an advertisement or short biography for someone when your name is never revealed – and something else entirely to pour your own words out to the world with your name attached and wait, slightly ‘terricited’ to find out if those words you so carefully crafted are good enough to catch the attention of others. *Alarm sounds*
That’s all the time I have for today folks, thanks for reading the ramblings of this mad, mad mind.