Writing 101, 1st Assignment 9/14/14
(Caution: “bad” words contained within)
It’s rather interesting to try to get my brain to just focus long enough to not over think the assignment. I have about 4 ‘important to me’ things rattling around my brain that all keep vying for attention. Several of which I don’t wish to actually think about, let alone write about, at all, which leaves me with one thing I really want to think about – but am concerned about ‘over-thinking’, which leaves me with one thing I’m perusing – but am having self-doubt over (writing) and a couple of normal, mildly stressful things. All of which have led to one long-ass paragraph about nothing. Can I create a blog about nothing? Would Seinfeld be able to pull it off? Would Jason Alexander? Will anyone get the joke I just made?
I suppose if I were to create a ‘blog about nothing’ it would have to involve a ‘bathroom book’ installment and something about someone I know who dances just horribly; which technically would be about me… I don’t dance quite as badly as Elaine, but would likely earn at least a bronze at the What-the-fuck Dance-off competition. I’ve also been known to take a book or three into a bathroom… but never while in a bookstore.
Perhaps Seinfeld isn’t the right sitcom-esque model for a blog. Maybe Roseanne would be better (I’d say Cosby, but I swear far too much. If I were to ever be part of a sitcom based on my life it would have to be done by HBO or Showtime, somewhere that I could drop in the more-than-occasional “fuck this’ and “dumb bitch” that. Somewhere that flashing titties and men doing cartwheels in kilts (wearing only what a true Scotsman would underneath) wouldn’t be frowned upon. It would be amazing! Good people doing good things… raising their children right; you know – to be kind, not judgmental, to help their families, friends and communities! People who pay it forward and work hard and also party their asses off, pull goofy pranks, and clean up after. It would be a sitcom-like blog for the modern masses, where hipsters and hippies could roam freely with the bikers and ‘bear’s and bond over tacos and home-brew; being loveable and incredibly UN-politically correct at the same time!!! And… and…and … wait..what’s that noise? My 20 minutes is up? Alright-y then. Thank you and goodnight!